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Sunday, July 20, 2008

Emo VS Stupiak


Hey people, it has been so long since my last post. Exactly 2 weeks.

School and ICA just drive me nuts. Lots and lots coming in. 4 more ICAs to go, 1 skill + 4 exams. Oh my, this is so insane. Will i survive to the end? Final year project is another headache. I'd not enough sleep for the last 2 weeks. As a result, acne outbreak again. I need to conceal them!!

Moreover, my hair is in a mess everyday, I urgently need rebonding as proper treatment for it. The prob is that i couldn't find any time to go back hometown, rebond here is way too expensive. Well, i'll make my way back to cure my hair before i move butt to London. Don't want to take pic with my stupiak hair!! HAha..

Too much commitment stress me down!!

That day sista counted say what i gave family ($250) is way not enough to cover wat i spent @ home. All the dinners, electricity & water, shampoos and stuff.. Well, my allowance isn't that much to give more. Furthermore i'm going overseas. Already spent all my savings since year 1. I dun think enough to cover my expenses over there. I think need to eat maggie mee everyday larh. Dun wanna get money from family. XIanzz.. It's not easy to be financially independent since the age of 18. I really pray for hospital sponsor me as much as they could. All because of this trip I sacrifices so much!

I just wished to graduate asap and finish up my 3 years bond. I dun know what future holds. How i wished the day of Christ comes is just tomorrow.. Then we dun have to suffer. There will be no tears in Heaven. No more sadness and all..

Silas's parents are both sick lately. One going thru radiotherapy and the other one admitted hospital for biopsy. It has been tough for him to take care of parents, having tests and church + campus crusade commitments at the same time. But i'm not any better. Dun like those pm syndrome! "Love is patient, love is kind. Love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love never gives up and its faith, hope and patience never fail." Patience repeated twice in these verses, indeed, we need to be patient to love someone or being love by someone.. It's not easy though.

Sometimes I will think what is the reason to get together or married? I was told two is better than one, when one is spiritually down, another could offer help. What if the other one get upset? Well, we need to pray hard for wisdom and patience from God. Only He is perfect!

"Every test that you have experienced is the kind that normally comes to people. But God keeps his promise, and He will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm: at the time you are put to test, he will five you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out" 1 Cor 10:13

That night Caren was sharing her troubles as we exchanged. I pray hard for her. Pray that she knows what she is doing and pray all that is pleases in God's eyes. As sometimes we know we are not supposed to do something, but emotion drives us to do it. Then we regret in the end and repent before God..

Dun know why I so emo tonight.. Nonsense!

inspiration left.
[Sunday, July 20, 2008]